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HOWARD STERN SHOW FULL 1-17-2008 + FULL WRAP UP Show 64K MP3 CF torrent


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HOWARD STERN SHOW FULL 1-17-2008 + FULL WRAP UP Show 64K MP3 CF


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Jillian Grace Has No Comment On Spade Pregnancy For The Stern Show. 01/17/08. 6:00am
Artie's Weight And Other Various Discussions. 01/17/08. 6:20am
More Jillian Grace And David Spade Discussions. 01/17/08. 6:25am
Gilbert Gottfried's Cheapness Discussed. 01/17/08. 6:35am
Bob Grant Humiliated, American Idol Ratings And More. 01/17/08. 6:40am
Howard Reads Some E-mail, Takes Some Phone Calls. 01/17/08. 6:50am
Lisa G's Howard 100 News Preview And Jon Hein's Burger King Complaint List. 01/17/08. 7:15am
A Quick Benjy And Ivy Update. 01/17/08. 7:40am
Mel Brooks Not Rescheduling After Canceling. 01/17/08. 7:42am
Various Phone Calls, News Stories And Discussions. 01/17/08. 7:45am
Richard - No Shower Or Change Of Clothes In 3 Days. 01/17/08. 8:00am
Howard Sings Some Cat Stevens Songs. 01/17/08. 8:10am
Eric The Midget Actor's Mind Numbingly Dull Hour. 01/17/08. 8:15am
Penn Jillette Visits. 01/17/08. 8:50am
The Gossip Game With Mike Walker. 01/17/08. 9:55am
Howard 100 News, Wrap Up Show And Superfan Roundtable Previews. 01/17/08. 10:10am
Robin's News. 01/17/08. 10:15am
Bubba Calls In For A Quick Thank-You. 01/17/08. 10:50am
Wrap Up Show - Penn Jillette Interview. 01/17/08. 11:00am
Wrap Up Show - Jillian Grace And David Spade Theories. 01/17/08. 11:20am
Wrap Up Show - Best Guests. 01/17/08. 11:25am
Wrap Up Show - Disgusting Richard Christy. 01/17/08. 11:35am
Wrap Up Show - Ivy And Benjy. 01/17/08. 11:45am


Thursday, January 17, 2008


Jillian Grace Has No Comment On Spade Pregnancy For The Stern Show. 01/17/08. 6:00am
Show opening bits and songs included: ''Ol' Black OJ'' song parody, Semisonic performing ''Closing Time'' live in Howard's K-Rock studio.

Howard started off the show singing along with his opening theme song that he couldn't remember the lyrics to. He said that Rob Zombie wrote down the lyrics for him and he just read them that day and now he doesn't remember them.

Howard said Artie asked him if he heard from David Spade yesterday and he never did. Robin said that he just had a bomb dropped on him and he probably didn't want to hear them talking about that on the show. Artie said he called Spade and he played phone tag with him. He actually did call him back but they never spoke to each other.

Howard said that Gary tried to get Jillian Grace on the phone but she never did call in. He said that she did write them back though. He said that they basically discovered her and he thinks that she should call in.

Howard was going to read the note from Jillian but he didn't have it printed out. He asked Jason to get it for him but jokingly told him that he doesn't think he likes him and he sees what the other people are complaining about back in the office.

Howard said he was kind of disappointed in seeing this e-mail from Jillian. He said that she finally has something of value for the show and she won't call in. He said she's had very little going on up until now and now she's unavailable. He said this is his fate. Jason brought the letter in a short time later. Howard read it and she basically says that she will let them know if she does make any statements to the press. It sounded like a pre-written press release or something.

Howard said he thinks that she may have a whole staff now that she's planning this whole baby thing. Gary said that she's clearly blocking her e-mail now. Gary said that he replied to that e-mail and it came back blocked. He said it came back as blocked when he responded to it.

Howard said he figures that Spade is praying for a miscarriage. Robin thought that was wrong but Howard said he's pretty sure that's what he's wishing for.

Howard had some audio from June 14, 2004 (He may have had the wrong date, I have June 21) when they were talking to Jillian about what was going to happen to her once she got into Playboy. He said that her mother had brought her in and they figured she could get into Playboy. In the clip Artie is talking about some of the people that she's going to meet out at the Playboy mansion. They threw out names like Sam Simon and a bunch of other people who were going meet her and end up marrying her. Artie even threw in David Spade's name at the time. He told Jillian that she was going to be ''Jillian Spade.'' Howard asked her to let them know what his house was like after she had gotten there.

Howard played another clip from September 25, 2004 where they were goofing around with her a little more when she called in. Howard threw out David Spade's name again at that time as if they knew that this would eventually happen one day. They actually predicted her future.

Howard said that it was unbelievable that they were able to come up with that stuff. Robin wondered how they knew that it was going to happen. Artie said that he was just going through the rolodex in his head of the guys who go to the mansion and that was one of the names that came up.

Howard brought up Eddie Murphy and how he went out and got married but now he's saying that the marriage wasn't legitimate and they're not really married. He said that Eddie and this woman barely know each other and they're running around like idiots going out and getting married. They spent a few minutes talking about how crazy that is.

Howard and the guys were also talking about Spade getting caught up in this pregnancy thing. One phone caller thinks that Jillian may have trapped Spade into this whole thing but Howard said that he had to be a willing participant in the whole thing. He said that there's no way he would go out and bang chicks like that without a condom if he was Spade.

Artie said that he thinks that it could be a little shady if you think about it. Robin asked him if he ever goes in bareback when he's banging chicks. He said he has and that he actually had a scare one time and took care of the woman who claimed that he was the father. The woman went to a planned parenthood place and took care of it for him.


Artie's Weight And Other Various Discussions. 01/17/08. 6:20am
A caller told Howard that he had stomach surgery and lost a bunch of weight and he thinks that Artie could benefit from it. Howard said he thinks that stuff is dangerous and you really need to work on your issues before you go in and get an operation. Artie thanked the guy too but said that he doesn't have a metabolism problem, he just has an eating problem.

Howard talked about what you see on these shows like The Biggest Loser and how it proves that people can control their weight if they control their diets and work out. Artie could do that if he wanted to. Artie said he was in good shape back when he was doing The Norm Show and had time in the afternoon to work out. Now he says that his schedule doesn't allow it.

Howard said that there is a gym in the building they're in and Artie passes it every day. He also said that people who do lose a lot of weight don't look healthy. He said that their skin sags and it just doesn't look good. Artie said that he would never have his stomach stapled, he's just not like that.

Another caller told Howard that the Will and Jason fight was good yesterday but he kind of cut them off. Howard said he has a skill there and he knows when to put an end to something like that on the air. He said that Will and Jason work in the office there and he was shocked to hear that they're not as close as he thought they were. He aids that not everyone gets along when they work together but it does make for good radio. He said they sound childish when they fight like that though.


More Jillian Grace And David Spade Discussions. 01/17/08. 6:25am
Howard read through some headlines from The Onion to the guys. He thought some of them sounded pretty funny. Gary then came in and said that Star Magazine has an article about Jillian Grace and David Spade. He thinks that the article may have been written by Jillian's people and they're making it seem like Spade knew that they were having unprotected sex and knew what he was getting into.

Howard said they had a picture of Jillian in the article and she looks really hot. She was at the Playboy mansion at the time. Howard then read through the article and they say that Spade is basically turning his back on Jillian who just turned 22 in December. Spade is 43. In the article they talk about some of the other celebrities that Spade has dated. They also talk about Spade getting Jillian's phone number from Playboy and how they hooked up after that.

They claim that Jillian and David talked about having a kid together but Artie said there's no way Spade would say that. Howard said they also talk about how Spade was informed about the baby around Christmas via text message.

Howard said that David doesn't even know for sure that this is going to be his kid. He doesn't know for sure that she got knocked up by him. Gary came in and said that they had a post on Jillian's Myspace page. Here's what it said:

1/16/2008 I am making zero claims to any news media. First of all out of respect to Howard Stern should I have a news flash he will be the first to know. Second any trip a girl takes to the pharmacy she takes alone. And third I would like to tell Star Magazine that in a small town everyone claims to be your friend.

She's basically saying that the person who contact Star magazine wasn't necessarily her real friend. Howard and the guys spent a few more minutes. Howard said that she really does owe them the scoop because they did get her into the magazine.


Gilbert Gottfried's Cheapness Discussed. 01/17/08. 6:35am
Howard said that Gilbert Gottfried was on the show yesterday and he apparently forgot to get in a plug for a show he was doing. He said he wondered what's wrong with that guy. He said that Gilbert was there for hours and didn't plug it.

Howard said that Gilbert walked out of the studio with two bottles of Poland Spring water and it's like a sickness that he has where he's so cheap that he has to take food and water like that so he doesn't have to pay for it.

Howard told a story about Gilbert going out with this woman they knew. She said that she ended up paying the bill for the meal when Gilbert vanished for a long period of time. She felt really weird about it and had to pay herself. Gilbert never offered to pay but he showed up right after she paid the bill.

Howard said that Gilbert walked out with the two bottles of water yesterday and held them up to his chest as he was leaving. Gary said that he has a move where he puts two to the side and drinks one in the studio. The two are apparently the two that he takes home.

Gary said that he asked Gilbert about being part of the Friar's club. Gilbert doesn't go there because he doesn't want to pay for the membership even though he'd get free food by going there. Artie said that you don't pay the first year you join that club.

Gary said that Stuttering John used to do shows with Gilbert and he would take syrup packets when they'd go out to eat. Howard said that's embarrassing and he can't imagine carrying all of that stuff around in his bag.



Bob Grant Humiliated, American Idol Ratings And More. 01/17/08. 6:40am
Howard said that there's this radio industry publication called Radio and Record. He said that they contacted Bob Grant, who Howard is a fan of. He said that Bob Grant was Rush Limbaugh before Rush was even a sperm in his father's balls. He said that he was much more talented than Rush ever was but he never got the exposure that Rush did.

Howard said that they wanted to honor Bob Grant with some kind of lifetime achievement award and Bob was going to accept it. He said that they then put out a press release where they said that they did some research and decided to pull the offer and not give him the award. They said that he did some things in his career and made some comments that they felt shouldn't get him the honor. Howard said that's a real embarrassment for Bob and they've humiliated the guy.

Howard said that he's a fan of Radio and Record but this is just wrong. He said that he's gotten some awards from them himself and this is just a bush league move in his opinion.

Howard said that Jon Hein gave him some ratings information about American Idol and they're about 4 million viewers down from last year's shows. He said that this year has a bunch of good looking girls so far and he's looking forward to watching.

Robin said that even the dummies on the show aren't as entertaining this year. She said that she does watch that part of the show but the rest of it doesn't interest her.

Howard said that English Bull Dogs have moved up to one of the top spots for the kind of dog people want to own. He said that they're great dogs and very cut but they're ultra sensitive to everything. He said that his dog shakes if it starts to lightning and thunder. He said the dogs look mean but they really are big babies. Artie said that's because people watched the Bugs Bunny cartoons and the bull dog in those cartoons was mean. Howard said you have to be prepared to spend a lot of time caring for these dogs because they are a handful.

Howard read an article in the paper and the name of this kid was Nixzmary which he had never seen before. Robin had heard of it though.

Howard read a story about Sean Penn getting a divorce from Robin Wright Penn who used to be really hot. Artie figured that she hit that magical age of 45 or something and now Penn is done with her.


Howard Reads Some E-mail, Takes Some Phone Calls. 01/17/08. 6:50am
Howard read through some e-mail. He said that people don't want to hear about Benjy's sex life. they're tired of all of that. He told Benjy that he's not going to talk about that stuff anymore. He thought that Benjy was crying but Artie told him it was actually just sweat. He asked Benjy to talk to find out if his voice was still gone. Benjy's voice is coming back after he lost it out in Vegas over the weekend.

Howard said that someone wrote in about a story that Artie told about Bono. Artie said he knew that it was just a rumor or a gossip story but it was a funny joke. Gary said that if you want to find out if that stuff is true or not you can go to Snopes.com where they debunk stories like that.

Howard read some mail about Gilbert Gottfried's visit yesterday. Some fans liked Gilbert's George Jessel impression. Richard came in and said that he didn't know who that guy was until Gilbert did the impression. He didn't even know who Paul Lynde was until yesterday.

Howard said that some people were upset with Tim Sabean not buying Scott the Engineer a Nano. Others thought that Scott was a big baby about the whole thing.

Howard said that someone wrote in about a comment that Ralph made on the show the other day when they were talking about football. The guy gave a bunch of statistics about all of that stuff.

Howard took a call from Bong Hit Eric who said that Eric the Midget was complaining about him being bad for the moral of the show or some shit like that. Howard said he really doesn't care about any problem he may have with Eric the Midget.

Howard took another call from a guy who brought up a story about a guy who was forced to have a rectal exam after a back injury. The guy told him the story as he heard it. He said that the guy is now suing the hospital because he didn't want them to do the exam on him. The guys talked about that for a few minutes. Robin said that if you ask not to have something like that done, the doctors should just let the guy go and not do it. Howard pointed out that Robin was rectally examined out in San Francisco one time. She said that guy had permission to do that though.

the caller asked Howard about his chess rating. Howard said that it's gone down a bit lately and he's between 1500 and 1600 now. He said he had some bad games and lost some of his score. The guy asked Howard if he'd be willing to play a friend of his show is rated at about 1800. If Howard won, the caller would donate $50,000 to the North Shore animal League. If Howard lost, he'd have to go up on stage at a charity event and play with The Losers. Howard said he really didn't want to play against this guy, he'd probably lose.

The caller, Eric from Hoboken, asked Artie one more question and said that he hasn't gotten laid in a long time. He said that he'd like to be Artie's JD out in Vegas in February. That led to Artie talking about this guy who he sees every morning. He said that they show up at the coffee shop every morning and the guy is always on the phone too. He said that he gets on like 95 percent of the time so Howard must be into what he gives to Will when he calls in. Howard said he noticed that he never gets to the subject that he says he's going to.

Howard let that guy go and another caller said he's just an asshole. Artie said that he seems like a good looking guy and a successful guy and he doesn't mind if he comes out to Vegas with him.

The next called told Howard that he loved when Beth called in yesterday. He said that she does sound like she's losing her attraction to Howard. Artie said that he doesn't agree but he knows what he's talking about. He said that she was very assertive with Howard but she was just trying to make a point and that was the only way she could make it happen.

The caller and Howard spent a short time talking about the whole Beth thing but Howard got fed up and said that he had to take a break. He didn't want to get into all of that with the guy and he was explaining himself too much. He went to break a short time later.



Lisa G's Howard 100 News Preview And Jon Hein's Burger King Complaint List. 01/17/08. 7:15am
After the break we heard a prank call that High Pitch Eric made to a woman about some animals she was selling. Howard came back a short time later, in the middle of a conversation with JD. He was asking JD about some clips he had from Eric the Midget's internet show. He said that he's not sure if Eric called in to promote that or not, he couldn't remember.

Lisa G came in with her Howard 100 News preview. She said that people were probably wondering where the cupcakes were since there were none. Howard said that they usually have Crumbs bakery bring in cupcakes but yesterday they were late and people were getting upset. He said that Gary told him that Jon Hein, who is diabetic, was upset because he adjusts his insulin intake that day so he can eat one of those cupcakes.

Artie said that the cupcake that Jon eats is even too rich for him. He said that it's an Oreo cupcake that's just insane. He said that Jon has to prepare to eat that thing .Howard said he heard that Jon eats fast food for lunch every day.

Jon came in and told Howard that he won't eat snacks on Tuesday nights because he knows that he can have that cupcake the next morning. Lisa said that the delivery guy dropped the box and there wasn't a back up order so they couldn't get the cupcakes there. Lisa said she spoke to the owner about it and he was saying it was too late to get them there by the time he found out about it. She said they did get some comments about Artie eating those cupcakes.

Howard said that if you microwave popcorn and sniff in that fake butter steam, there's a dangerous carcinogenic compound in there in some popcorn's.

Gary told Howard that the woman at Wendy's that Jon goes to knows his order so well that they don't even have to talk anymore. The guys talked about Jon's odd behavior with that stuff. Howard said that Jon only likes certain junk food and will only go to Wendy's. He won't go to Burger King. Jon said he always had hated Burger King. He said that he gave the guys a list of why he thinks they suck. Howard read through that list and Howard read a couple and said ''Jesus Christ...'' as he was going through it.

Jon said that he gets a triple at Wendy's with fries and a large diet Coke. He said that it's supposed to be 3/4 of a pound but he doesn't think that it's that much.

Howard read through some of Jon's other complaints about Burger King and he complains about everything from the names of the foods they have and the cleanliness of the individual stores. Howard said that it's not that easy to ''have your way'' at Burger King like they say you can. He also complained about the toys that they give in their kid's meals. The Burger King character never really looks the same from year to year either. Jon said that McDonald's controls that stuff much better than Burger King.

Howard said that this list that Jon put together is amazing. He figured that when you don't take time to masturbate, you must have time to put a list like that together. He read through some of the other stuff on the list and Jon complained about the brand marketing with the ''BK'' stuff like the BK Broiler and things like that while McDonald's does a much better job with things like that. Jon thinks that McDonald's has more prestige than Burger King as well.

Howard took a call from a guy who said that Jon is out of his mind and can't believe that he adjusts his insulin so he can eat a cupcake. Another caller said that this just shows that Jon is the biggest douche bag ever with this list of his. Howard said he kind of likes this list, that's what he likes about Jon. Another caller said that Jon is more fucked up than anyone else on the show. Artie talked about going to a baseball game with him one time and Jon ate more junk than even he did.

Another caller asked how Jon can compare fast food restaurants like that. Howard said the guy knows fast food and he was just putting the list together for them. Another caller said that he agrees with Jon about the Burger Kings and how they're all filthy. Artie said he loves the food at Burger King and disagrees with him on that assessment.

Artie asked Jon about what his perfect meal would be. Jon said that he'd like to have Nathan's fries out of all of them. Howard cut him off and said he read that Jon wants to go to Columbus Ohio because it's the fast food capital of the world. Jon said there's a road out there where they have every single fast food chain restaurant on that road. He said that's where they test out the places.

Howard asked Jon if he likes pizza. Jon said he's not a fan of the fast food pizza stuff. He said that he really likes the In and Out Burger places out in the West. He said that when he goes to Vegas, he has to get a burger because they really are amazing.

Artie said that he and Jon went to this place called Steak and Shake and they had really good steaks and shakes. Howard asked Jon to do an F, Marry Kill with Nathan's Fries, a Double Quarter Pounder and a Crumbs cupcake. He picked the Nathan's fries to marry, the cupcake to F and the Quarter Pounder to kill.

Howard said that Jon hasn't given up eating red meat at this point while so many other people have. Jon said that he's a meat and potatoes type of guy so that's what he enjoys eating.

Howard said his shrink told him that he knew that he didn't eat red meat anymore but he never told him that so he wasn't sure how he knew. The shrink told him that all of his patients have given up eating red meat so he just knew.

Lisa G said that Crumbs has raised over $10,000 for the AIDS charity that they donate to when people buy them. She said that Benjy is going to be riding a bicycle to raise some money for a charity this week. Benjy said that he's going to be doing that for an hour so he doesn't think he's going to die like Howard said he thought would happen.

Lisa said that they have a story about Nick Manning getting kicked out of the building he was in with his lingerie store.



A Quick Benjy And Ivy Update. 01/17/08. 7:40am
Robin asked if Benjy is still with Ivy Supersonic. Gary said that the latest he's heard is that Benjy has agreed to fight Chuck Zito thanks to Ivy. The guys spent a few minutes talking about what's going on there. Benjy said he got the e-mail from Ivy this morning about the Chuck thing and he thinks that he should be getting more than $100,000 to do that fight. The guys all figured that Benjy would die if he got into the ring with Chuck, even if Chuck had one arm tied behind his back.


Mel Brooks Not Rescheduling After Canceling. 01/17/08. 7:42am
Howard took a phone call from a guy who brought up McDonald's again and how they haven't sponsored Howard's show in many years. Howard said that they were worried about his image on the air but meanwhile, they're feeding this junk food to people and making people sick. He said that food isn't good for you.

The caller also asked Howard about Mel Brooks who was apparently out selling his book at a books tore and singing songs to the people at the signing. He was supposed to be on the show earlier this week but backed out saying he was sick. Howard said that it's a weird story because they heard that he was a big fan of the show but then he backed out of it. He said he's heard from a bunch of people that he was a big fan.

Howard said he read in the paper that Mel was out dancing and carrying on the day he called them saying he was sick. He said that he doesn't know what happened there. Gary said that he spoke to the publicist about the interview and he was supposed to hear back from him by the end of the day. He didn't hear anything and tried contacting him the next day. The guy went on vacation so he had to contact someone else. He said that they told him that they weren't going to be booking him again. He sent back an angry e-mail saying that the whole thing was handled very poorly.

Howard said he wasn't even looking for Mel to come on the show but he thought it would be nice to have him in. Now they've made them look bad and the publicists just jerked them around.


Various Phone Calls, News Stories And Discussions. 01/17/08. 7:45am
The caller was also asking Howard about some of the stuff that was discussed on the Wrap Up Show yesterday. Howard ended up talking about his first marriage and how he didn't know what he was doing at the time. He said that he's got his eyes wide open now and he knows what he's getting into.

The caller had a bunch of people yelling behind him so Howard had to bail out on his call. Howard read a quick note about the head of the FCC talking about how they hope to have the XM and SIRIUS decision by the end of the first quarter of this year.

Howard read a news story about a guy who tied up his son after he refused to put on a Green Bay Packers shirt after they won over the weekend. That led to Artie talking about how he was thinking about going out to Green Bay to see the game this weekend.

A caller told Howard how great it was to see this Howard TV special where he was at a chocolate store and eating all kinds of gourmet chocolates. Howard said that he was talking to someone about Gary's weight after the person saw him on Letterman. Howard said that it was a friend who saw him on TV. Gary thought that it was someone in the green room but it was just someone who saw the TV show.

Howard told Gary that fixing his teeth is ludicrous and he really should just get his weight under control. Gary said he's going to join a gym and start working out again. He said that his wife is kind of worried about that and not so much the weight.

Gary said that if he was single, he's not sure if he'd even get thinner to date. HE's with Artie on that. Artie still gets hot chicks and he's 300 pounds. He said he could use the Stern Show name to get chicks like Artie is doing.

Howard said he heard from a friend of his who said that she used to be attracted to Artie back when his movie came out but now she's not because he's gotten so big. Gary said that he gets e-mail from hot chicks who want to bang Artie all the time. They're into him even at 300 pounds.

Gary said he had a problem with Artie in Beer League because he wasn't fat. He said he'd love to see a remake of the movie now that he's fat. Howard said he had to go to break a short time later but Artie mentioned how hot Robin looked this morning. He said that she's looking like a 17 year old now that she's lost all of this weight. He said he's not sure he could do what she's done.

Gary said that the stuff that Robin has to drink to stay in shape looks like raw sewage. Robin said that it was a smoothie with not enough liquid in it. She said that it's protein powder that's mixed very thick. She said that it's a hemp drink so Howard said that she shits rope. Howard told Robin that she is looking amazing and the extra 15 pounds she's looking to lose is a perfect number. He said if she loses that, she could get knocked up by David Spade. Robin said that she's pretty sure she would go for someone other than David or Pauly Shore. She might go for someone like Dane Cook or one of those Blue Collar Comedy tour guys.


Richard - No Shower Or Change Of Clothes In 3 Days. 01/17/08. 8:00am
Howard said he wanted to talk about how disgusting Richard Christy is. He's wearing the same clothes he's worn for 3 days because he claims that he's sick and can't change because he gets the chills. Howard asked him why he doesn't change. Richard said he gets so cold that he just doesn't get out of his clothes and sleeps in them. Howard said that people are saying that he smells bad. Richard said he just doesn't feel good. the guys all told him to go home then.

Artie told Richard that he might have the AIDS, he's a homo. Richard said that he hasn't changed and hasn't showered in 3 days. Artie told Howard that this is a human resources issue and if he smells him, he's going to leave. He said that everyone on the plane from Vegas was coughing and sneezing around him.

Howard said that Richard has backed out of the deal to have Sal's balls in his mouth. Richard said he had second thoughts on that whole thing and he doesn't want a used video game system for taking balls in his mouth.

Howard told Richard to go home now and change. Richard said he's been told not to go home from work unless he's puking. Howard didn't understand that. Richard said that it's the work ethic that he got when he was working in construction. Howard kicked him out of the studio because they don't need to get sick themselves. Howard told Richard to go home and shower.

Howard figures that they're all going to get sick anyway so Richard might as well stick around. Richard just touched the door handle and they all noticed that. Howard went to break right after that.


Howard Sings Some Cat Stevens Songs. 01/17/08. 8:10am
After the break we heard a Heidi Cortez clip edited in with some clips of Robin so it sounded like they were having sex. Howard came back and sang along with a Cat Stevens song that Fred was playing. Robin didn't like that he was making her like the song. She said that she hates Cat Stevens and didn't want to like the song. Fred said that it was a live performance there at SIRIUS and he was going under his name Yusuf Islam. Robin said that he does still sound good.

Howard said that Cat Stevens walked away from it all and went off on some religious thing for years. He said he went kooky religious and gave away all of his money. Robin said he stopped performing all of his hit songs for a long time too. Now he's back to doing them apparently.

Howard asked Fred if he did some other songs so Fred looked them up. Howard was singing some of the songs that he liked and Robin knew that he was going to do that because he does that every time he brings up that guy's name.


Eric The Midget Actor's Mind Numbingly Dull Hour. 01/17/08. 8:15am
Howard said that Eric the Midget has this internet show that he does and they can all watch him on the web when he calls in. While American Idol is on, Eric has been doing live commentary. He said that he's got a co-host who helps him out but she echoes every time she talks. Eric watches American Idol and he makes commentary on that whole thing while this sidekick is echoing in the background.

Howard said that he could watch this stuff all day long so he had to ask Robin to let him know if it gets boring. Howard played the first clip where Eric and his sidekick, Gina, was asking Eric questions about American Idol as they were watching it. Robin said that it was very exciting, in a very sarcastic voice.

Eric didn't have a lot to say and Gina was talking more than him. Artie said that Eric sucks at radio and they should just be honest with him like he wants people's families to be with the people who were on Idol.

In another clip Eric is asked some questions and one of them was about the type of shows he likes to watch. Eric mentioned a couple of shows and had Artie laughing at each one. Eric sounded a lot different on his web cam mic instead of on the phone. Benjy thought that it was a scam because the voice was so different. He said that the whole thing was different. Artie said he never thought it was a fake at all. Howard assured Benjy that it wasn't a fake.

Howard said that he had more but wasn't sure if they wanted to hear it. Artie said that it was very entertaining. Howard played another clip where a fan asked Eric what he's doing about his script. Eric said that Howard isn't earning the script so he's not working on it.

Gina asked Eric if he was going to call into the show the next morning but it turns out that Eric was holding off to see if they could get his girlfriend Kendra to call in by Thursday. Howard heard that Eric was sick this morning and that's why he wasn't calling in.

Howard asked JD what else he should play. JD said that the whole show is the same thing over and over again so he could play anything. Howard played a clip where Gina asked Eric if he knows what the big surprise is that Howard has in store for him. Eric said he found out about it and it was just getting Kendra on the show. Howard said that's not it at all. Howard said that this woman who is talking to Eric seems to have some kind of radio experience. She's too polished according to Robin.

Howard played another clip of Eric commenting on the end of the show and having pretty much nothing to say. Howard took a call after that and the guy said that Eric sounds like that Schmigel character from the Lord of the Rings movie. Artie said that this guy in the Confederacy of Dunces book is kind of like Eric because he watched TV and yells at everyone.

In another clip Eric is asked if he drinks or does drugs. Eric said that he does neither and he's told Howard that. Eric was calling one of the guys on Idol a geek and making fun of the guy. Howard said that this is a great accompaniment to American Idol.

Eric called in and said that it was good and he shouldn't bad mouth it. Howard said that it was fine. Artie told him that it sucked so bad that the suck meter went around in a 360 and it got back to good again. Eric asked him if 360 is his weight. That got a few laughs.

Howard asked Eric what kind of numbers he had watching him that night. Eric said that the first night they crashed Stickam and GoDaddy.com because they had so many. Howard asked Eric what name he went by that night and played some of the edited clips that they've played the past few days like Eric the...

Asswipe
Asshole
Butt fucker
Disrespectful piece of crap
Idiot
Jackass
Piece of Crap
worthless sack of shit
Piece of Shit
Retard

Howard asked Eric who the girl was that was hosting with him. Eric said that her name was Gina so Artie kept asking him what her real name was over and over and said that her name was Meredith? Eric kept correcting him about that.

Howard told Eric that the big thing he has planned for him isn't what he thinks it is. Eric said that's interesting since he has an inside source, but whatever. Artie told Eric to keep doing that shitty show. Eric told Artie to do the same.

Howard asked Eric what he wants him to call him. He played more of the edited clips of Eric but Eric said that's not him. Howard gave Eric a plug for the web site that he broadcasts on. Eric said it's JFSC.tv.

Artie asked Eric how he prepares for that show and if he just does something that he sucks at for four hours ahead of time. He said he's never been so bored in his life. Eric told him he's never been that fat either.

Howard asked Eric who he thinks is going to win the Packers / Giants game. Eric said that since they're New York fans he'll go with the Giants. Eric was trying to say something but Artie told him to go suck on his own show to shut him up.

Ralph called in and said that Eric should go with ''Eric the Shithead'' because it has some flow. He also said that Eric needs to do some color commentary when he's doing that show of his. He needs to describe what's happening at the time on the show. Howard said that people could watch it on TV and see Idol themselves.

Howard told Eric that his show was pretty bad. Eric said that JFSC hopes to get some celebrity interviews soon. That made Artie laugh hysterically. He told Eric that he's a boob. Eric told Artie that he has man boobs. Artie said that he could get thinner, he'll never get taller.

The guys were coming up with some new names for Eric's web show. Artie threw out the name ''The Mind Numbingly Dull Hour'' but Ralph told him it was actually 2 hours. Howard said that Eric must be annoyed with Ralph calling in every time he's on. Eric said he should call in earlier so Ralph is still sleeping.

Howard let Eric go a short time later. He told him he was working on his surprise and hopes to have it for him next week. Artie said that he's actually jealous of Eric and that's why he called it the Mind Numbingly Dull Hour. He said that he had another one where he was going to say it was the Shove Needles in Your Ears Hour.

The caller said that Eric's show sounded like the first moon landing because the technology was so bad. Howard and the guys goofed around with that for a short time. They were talking about how bad the show was and how funny that Ralph thought that there were actually people not watching Idol while they watched Eric.

Howard played some more of the Mind Numbingly Dull Hour show. Eric and Gina were talking about a guy's eyebrows. Howard said it really did sound like the first moon landing. He got on his megaphone and did an impression of what it sounded like to him. They had some fun with that for a few minutes before Howard went to break.



Penn Jillette Visits. 01/17/08. 8:50am
After the break we heard an Eric the Midget and Tabitha Stevens bit that Sal and Richard created. Fred also played some Larry Pierce ''Will You Swallow My Cum'' as they were coming back. Howard came back and had Penn Jillette come in. He hasn't been in for a few years. Robin said he told her that he comes on every 8 years or so. Penn came in and asked where he's supposed to sit. He didn't know that he was supposed to sit on the couch.

Howard asked Penn if he's dying his hair. Penn said of course he does, he's 52 and very grey. Howard claims that he doesn't dye his at all but he would if he went grey. Penn also pointed out that Howard has had some surgery on his face.

Howard asked Penn how long he's been together with Teller. Penn said that they've been working together for 30 years now. He said they're booked out in Vegas through 2010 and he said he never thought that he'd live that long. He said that they have a lot of freedom and finances out in Vegas and that's why they're doing it there. He said they had a Broadway show at one time and they were told that they could do anything they wanted but they had investors there who were always worried if they should be doing certain things. Penn said that out in Vegas the people don't even know what they do. He said that their bosses out there just let them do anything they want and don't ask questions. He said that they just keep doing what they want out there and they're left alone as long as they keep bringing in the crowds.

Penn said that they have new stuff coming into the show over the next four months and they do that so that any repeat customers they have will see new stuff.

Howard asked Penn about this David Copperfield guy and the trouble he got into recently. Penn said that he used to talk to him but he hasn't really spoken to anyone since he got into trouble. Howard read that Penn was in a bitter rivalry with Copperfield for a while but Penn said that he was just joking around when he got upset with him for claiming he could get a woman pregnant on stage without touching her. He said he got a note from Copperfield after that and he really thought it was some kind of crackpot or something. He called Copperfield and asked him about it and it turns out that it was really him. He said that when Copperfield asked him to stop commenting about him out in public, he agreed to do it.

Howard read some stuff that Copperfield has said about them and it was actually kind of funny. He was calling Penn and Teller the Beavis and Butt-Head of magic. Penn didn't seem to mind that.

Howard asked Penn if Teller is still not speaking in public. Penn said that Teller has directed a production of Macbeth in Red Bank, New Jersey so that's why he's in there today. He just went to see the show himself.

,Howard asked Penn about their comedy shows and how he goes out and performs for the audience before the shows. He plays bass in a jazz band and that's what they do before the show. Penn said he plays bass with a great piano player.

Howard asked Penn if he ever saw David Copperfield raping a woman when they were out. Penn joked that he would invite them over all the time for that kind of thing. He said that Copperfield never tried to rape him though. He said that he's a tough person to give rufies to.

Artie said that he's heard Teller speak before. Howard said he doesn't think that he ever has. Artie said that Teller spoke about Houdini in a special he saw.

Howard asked Penn about going to clown college when he was younger and how that went. Penn said that he was a juggling clown and he had to get made up like a clown but he wasn't really good at that. Howard said he's never really seen a funny clown in his life.

Penn said that he learned about a lot of this clown stuff when he went to this school. He said that he was 18 at the time and had left home to get away from all of that stuff. He said that he found out that a clown can not make any money. He said that they actually learned in a class that they had to say the name of the Ringling Brothers Barnum and Bailey Greatest Show on Earth or they'd be fined. He said he always did that and now he names the hotel he works at by the full name as well.

Penn said that he had a friend who toured with the Ringling show for 3 years and there were women who wanted to have sex with clowns in their make up and they'd actually take the women out in the back field and stick their dicks through the wire fence and the women would suck them off while they stared at their clown faces. He said he never had that happen to him because he never toured with the circus like that.

Howard asked Penn if he loves Teller like a brother at this point. Penn said that they have nothing to talk about but he does love him like a brother. He said they've gone through everything together so they have no stories to tell. Howard asked Penn who he would let die if he was stuck on a boat with Teller and his wife and it was sinking. Penn said that he would have to let Teller die. He said that he just doesn't think he could let his wife die.

Penn said that his mother once told him that he was getting too old and too picky before she died. He said that he eventually did find a woman who was just what he was looking for. He said that he was looking for an Atheist, libertarian just like he wanted.

Penn's wife was there but he said that she'd probably be afraid to come in the studio. Howard said he'd love to meet her. He asked Penn if she's the kind of woman he has to do everything with. Penn said that they do have kids so they do a lot of stuff together. Howard said that he's got some strange names for the kids. The daughter's name is Moxie Crimefighter Jillette. He said his wife didn't want to give a middle name so a friend suggested that they just give her something that means nothing. He said that's how they came up with the Crimefighter. He figured that it might get her out of a ticket some day when she's 17 years old. He said that it's already worked and his wife got out of a ticket when they told the cops what their daughter's name was.

Penn said that his son's name is Zolten which is actually his wife's maiden name. He said that the kid is a year and a half old and he's already the size of Robin. Howard asked him if he wants a weird kid. Penn said that he would like that and he can't imagine naming his kid Dave where he'd have the same name as 4 other kids in his class. He said that kids with nutty names are always happy with them.

Howard said that he remembered asking Frank Zappa what he should name his daughter. He said that Frank quickly said ''Moldrid'' and he thought the guy was out of his mind. He named his daughter Emily instead. He said that Emily recently asked him why he didn't name her Moldrid, she would have loved it. He said that she's 25 years old now.

Penn said that a guy like Bob naming his kid something wacky is different than someone like Penn naming their kid Moxie.

Howard gave Penn some plugs for his web site PennAndTeller.com and some other stuff they're doing. Then he asked him about the radio show he had on K-Rock after he left the station. Penn said he was doing the show from his house on the West coast so it was tough. He said that they were trying to find someone to replace Howard and there was just no way that was going to happen. He said that everything aligned perfectly for Howard back when he was working there and that just doesn't happen again.

Penn said that the whole FreeFM thing fell apart and they let him go earlier than he was supposed to leave. He said that it was very interesting to learn to be yourself for long periods of time on radio. Howard said that Penn was basically saying that even he couldn't replace himself on regular radio at this point.

Howard asked Penn about a co-worker that wanted to pay to have one of their listeners kill him. Penn said that it was like a hit man saying that but he never heard him say it. The guy, John London, was offering a few thousand dollars for the killing and a little more if it was made painful. Penn said that he didn't know this guy and only heard about what was going on. He said that the guy was pulling clips and blasting his show after it was over. He said that he just wanted it all to go away and he wasn't sure that he wanted to talk about it now. He did like that Howard was making it sound like this isn't the type of thing that he would do on the air. The guy crossed the line because there are nuts out there who would actually follow through with that kind of thing.

Howard asked Penn if they over paid him for the job over there like they did with David Lee Roth. Penn said that he didn't make a lot of money but he was only doing an hour long show. He said that he wasn't going to take phone calls in the beginning but then he started doing it and found out that he enjoyed talking to people.

Howard said that Penn went off on Mother Theresa on his show one day and he liked to hear that. Penn said that there's so much bullshit out there about her that he had to talk about it. He said that he got this information from this guy Christopher Hitchens who wrote a book about her. He explained some of the stuff that he found out about and how why he went off on her on the air.

Howard talked to Penn if he's become more normal now that he has kids. Penn said that he thinks he will become more normal in a few years as the kids get older. He asked Howard when kids get a vote on what you do in your life. Howard said that it comes very early. He said he came home with blue hair one day and the kids freaked out. He said he wanted some blue streaks but his whole head turned bright blue and the kids freaked out.

Howard asked Penn about this woman he married and how he found her. Penn said that she found him and said some magical words to him. He said that she had dinner with Richard Dawkins and Amazing Randy who told her she had to meet him. Penn said he hadn't met Dawkins yet but he was a fan of his. He said that it didn't take a long time to get Emily into bed. He said that their first kid was a test tube baby and they wanted to make things happen fast so they did it that way.

Howard said that Yucko the Clown was on the phone and asking where this fence is that guys are getting sucked off. Penn said that it was near a place that the Bailey's circus used to play often.

Robin asked Penn about this test tube baby thing and about the jerking off thing. He said that they had posters of hot chicks that he was supposed to jerk off to and it turned out that he had fights with all of the women in the posters. Every woman there he'd made cry or yelled at during his career. He said that they all disliked him so it was horrible to try and jerk off to all of that. He said he had to go home and jerk off and bring it back.

Howard asked Penn if he's going to tell his daughter that she was a test tube baby. He said of course he will and she'll get $35,000 less in her life than his son will because that's how much the test tube thing cost them. He said that their son cost them nothing.

Howard asked if Penn's wife would come in but Gary told him that she said no earlier. Penn asked her to come in if she wanted to. She came in a short time later and Howard said hello to her. Howard said that she has to thank Robin because she passed on Penn years ago. She did go out with him for a short time.

Howard asked Emily, or EZ as Penn calls her, if Penn is a good father. She said that he is and he'll probably want their kids to be less ''common'' than other kids. She said that they'll probably be a little different than other kids.

Howard asked EZ and Penn if they're going to try and keep the kids from learning about religion and stuff like that. Penn said that they're very young right now so he's not sure what's going to happen. He said that he'll still love his daughter no matter what she turns out to be so he doesn't really care either way.

Howard asked EZ how long it took for her to fall for Penn. She said that it was about a month. She held out for about 3 and a half weeks before she gave it up to him. Penn said that's only because she was in a different zip code. Howard asked her if the sex was good. She was saying that things were perfect at the time. Penn told her that she could leave now if she wanted. He told her what was going to happen next and said that he was going to ask her about anal and then ask her if she's had sex with a black guy and then Robin will ask about the kids to make her feel comfortable and then someone will come in and punch her in the cunt.

Howard asked EZ if Penn was the best she's ever had in bed. She said yes to that so Howard left it at that. He got back to Penn, who was very worked up during that rant about what his wife should expect. Penn was saying that he thinks that they're going to have fairly normal kids. He asked Howard if it was tough having kids grow up when you have a lot of money. Howard said that they do tell the kids that they can't just buy them everything they want. They tell them that they have to earn the money themselves.

Howard and Penn talked about their parenting and what that's going to be like. Penn said that he was 50 when his daughter was born so it's going to be a bit different for him. He said that he got sick of thinking about himself and that's why he wanted to have kids when he did.

Howard wrapped up with Penn and his wife and gave him some plugs for some videos that Penn does for Crackle.com. Penn told Howard that he'll be back in another 8 years since that seems to be the cycle he's on.

Howard was about to wrap up but Penn asked Howard about the old interviews he did with Tiny Tim. Howard told Penn that he was the greatest interview he ever did. Penn said that those interviews really were great. He talked about one time that Howard backed down to him when Tiny went off on him for using Jesus' name in a way he didn't like. Howard said that the guy was mentally ill so you have to back down at some point. Penn told him that the interviews really were great. Howard thanked Penn for that and said he makes him feel very good about himself.

Ralph called in and told Penn that he likes him a lot but he'd like to know who he supports for President. Penn said that Huckabee is a bass player and they've never had that. He said that it would probably go with Ron Paul if he could. He said that he loves some of the stuff he says but there are some things in his past that might come back to haunt him. Howard said that he likes what Paul has to say too. they wrapped up a short time later and went to break.


The Gossip Game With Mike Walker. 01/17/08. 9:55am
After the break we heard a prank call that Sal made to a pizza place using George Takei audio clips. We also heard a Baba Booey song parody and Artie singing an Anne Murray song. Fred played some Ozzy Osbourne ''Mr. Crowley'' as they were coming back. Howard came back a short time later and had Mike Walker on the phone. He said that they hadn't heard from him in a few weeks. Mike said he was on vacation. Howard told him he's not allowed to do that anymore.

Howard had Mike get to his Gossip Game a short time later. Here's how it goes... Each week Mike Walker calls in with four gossip stories. Three of the stories are from his National Enquirer gossip column. One of the stories is false. Everyone tries to pick out the false story. The stories will appear in Mike's gossip column each week after he plays with Howard. Here are this week's stories:

1. Eddie Murphy announced to his family that his recent marriage to Tracy Edmonds was symbolic and not legal. They got upset because they had paid thousands of dollars to fly in to see it. Eddie had to reimburse the family and it ended up costing him six figures.
2. Harrison Ford showed up to a picket line for the Writer's Strike with feet and hand warmers when a cold snap hit Los Angeles.
3. Angelina Jolie got into an argument with director Clint Eastwood on the set of a movie they're filming. She refused to do a scene the way Clint wanted it to go. She walked off the set but Clint just sat in his director's chair until she came back and agreed to do it his way.
4. Queen Latifa was on a flight recently and almost gagged when she got near the bottom of her cocktail when she noticed that her straw had been chewed on by someone else.

Howard and Fred picked story number 1 as the fake while Robin went with 3 and Artie with 2. The actual false story was number four. The guys talked about the stories for a few minutes before Howard wrapped up with Mike.


Howard 100 News, Wrap Up Show And Superfan Roundtable Previews. 01/17/08. 10:10am
Howard had Steve Langford come in with his Howard 100 News preview. Steve said that there may be a Wack Pack crime wave going on. they're chasing around angry Black and high Pitch Eric trying to find out more about their recent run-ins with the law. Angry got into a shoving match and had to pay a fine. They'll have more on that and on High Pitch Eric turning himself into the cops over what he did by leaving threatening messages on a woman's answering machine. Steve said they also have a story about Stuttering John's movie getting picked up by National Lampoon for distribution.

Steve said that they got an e-mail from Jackie, or someone claiming to be Jackie, about how they should be all over Fred Norris about what his problem is with Jackie. He claims that he has no idea why Fred would be so upset with him. Fred said that Jackie is an idiot, that's basically it. He said that Jackie knows, he's just trying to get more publicity by bringing this up.

Howard asked Jon Hein what he has coming up. Jon said they'll talk about Penn Jillette's visit today. They'll also talk about Richard Christy's illness and lack of a shower and changing clothes. They'll go over those things and a lot of the other stuff they covered today.

Howard went to Mutt from Superfan Roundtable who said they'll be talking about the back office feuds. He said he likes hearing them himself but they'll find out if the other fans like them. Howard told Mutt he hadn't been on SternFanNetwork in a long time and he was pleasantly surprised that there wasn't much negative on there. Mutt said he was glad to hear that. He said that Eric the Midget is boycotting that site so they'll be talking about that and a bunch of other things. Superfan Roundtable is on at 7pm tonight on Howard 101.


Robin's News. 01/17/08. 10:15am
Howard had Robin start her news after Fred played one of her theme songs. Artie was going nuts during that song. He was throwing stuff at Benjy so Howard wondered what was going on there. Artie said he was just enjoying his job. Fred was going to play that again but Howard told him not to because Artie was throwing shit around.

Robin got into her news and talked about a new Trojan condom machine that they're going to be bringing to clubs in the city. It'll be a photo machine with a condom dispenser in it.

Robin also talked about OJ Simpson and his problems in court. She had Howard playing some clips of the judge going off on OJ so Howard and Fred were both doing their OJ impressions and goofing on the guy. That led to them doing impressions of Jackie the Joke Man doing his black guy impression too.

Robin read a story about how the abortion rate in the country dropping to a new low. She also read a story about how doctors are now saying that lowering cholesterol may not be as much of a benefit to people as they thought.

Robin read a story about the creator of the Wham-o company dying. The guys were talking about some of the cool toys that company had back in the day. Howard said that the toy industry is very difficult and it's hard to know what kids are going to like. He said that things don't last long either, they come and go very quickly. He said he admires anyone who can make a living in that business. That eventually got them talking about the Frisbee and what the original name was. Artie joked that it was the N-word chaser. He said he loved the show where Stuttering John brought up the N-word chaser thing when he was talking about fireworks one day on the show. The Frisbee was originally called the Pluto Platter before Wham-O bought the rights to it.

Robin brought up a story about how the company may be going into a recession. That led to Artie talking about how he doesn't have to worry too much about money but that means that he'll have m

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